The movie Twilight is barely tolerable, and most musical parodies are in the same failboat. Put the two together and it’s less like “I-got-peanut-butter-in-your-chocolate,” and more like “I-got-turd-in-your-turd-in-your-eye.” Even though we recommend you watch these videos, we don’t recommend you watch them all the way through. A few seconds will be plenty, unless you’re one of those people who hurt themselves on purpose to know they are alive. If so, bookmark this post, come back, and save money on razor blades. Now here’s The 5 Most Intolerable Twilight Musical Parodies On YouTube.
5. Edward Cullen (Kanye West – Heartless Parody)
Love that autotune. It keeps in the intolerableness of the Kanye original. Also love the profanity in the first five seconds. Stay classy, guys. Sample Lyric : “Although it would suck to never turn 18, cause I know pedophiles will try to rape me.”
Views: 411,000
Rating: 5 stars
Actual Comment: “omg this is my ringtone!!! wooo”
4. The 7 Things I Love About Edward Cullen
Capt. Surprise, reporting for duty. There’s a Miley Cyrus parody about “Twilight.” Mixing Twilight with other horrible things seems like a trend. Where’s the “Twilight” Nickleback tribute? If it’s even possible, this song is worse than you would expect. The vocals are what it sounds like if you throw holy water on a satan-baby… in a cave.
Views: 150,000
Rating: 4 ½ stars
Actual Comment: “finally someone who gets it!!!!!”
3. I Kissed a Wolf (version 1)
First of all, we’re shocked, SHOCKED, that someone would use a copyrighted song in their YouTube video. We’re calling the Internet police. Second, we’re slightly more shocked that someone would do a parody video where they just play the original song without changing it at all. We guess you’re supposed to imagine the parody. Have you seen the box? Cause they are thinking WAY WAY outside it.
Views: 72,000
Rating: 4 ½ stars.
Actual comment: “ROTFLMFBO!!!!!!!!!!!! that was HI-larious!!!! I LOVED EVERY SECOND!!! XD I needed that laugh lol.”
2. Twilight (Live Your Life Parody)
This is by the same guy who did the Kanye West/”Twilight” parody. Try and sleep tonight knowing there is someone out there who is “known” for making Twilight parody songs. Someone who is going to keep doing it.
Views: 357,000
Rating: 4 ½ stars
Actual Comment: “i’m a twi-guy toooooo!”
1. I Kissed a Wolf (version 2)
Yes, this “idea” was done so many times it could have taken up the entire list. We almost wish we lived China right now because 1) they censor this kind of garbage and 2) pandas are adorable. This is like the 80’s video game of horrible, where there are unlimited levels of horribleness, and you just get a high score for living through the horrible.
P.S. If you are the 13-year-old girl who made this, we’re sorry to hurt your feelings, but you are fundamentally untalented. No offense.
Views: 179,000
Rating: 2 ½ stars.
Actual Comment: “that is not fcking cool♥ you should ashamed of your self♥ that is gay♥”
The lesson here is that mixing music with Twilight doesn’t make it better. You’ll need cheeseburgers to do that.
