Car culture and hip-hop culture often overlap, as does car-dealership culture and bad-commercial culture. (There are bad hip-hop dance moves in each.) The results of this melting pot (GO USA!) are the 10 Worst Local Hip Hop Car Commercials.
10. Laurel Kia
From the video description: “This is a funny local car commercial that has a good rap in order to attract new customers.” I don’t know who they got to “rap” this, but Hellen Keller has a smother flow.
9. Cavaliers Rap
“Hey, what rhymes with Cavaliers?”
“Fears? Sneers?…ears?”
“EARS! Get some average-looking girls to sing about that…NOW.”
8. I DeserveACar.com
Even though this commercial tries to use the hip hop vernacular, it doesn’t trust people to understand its “Real Talk.” “Hater” isn’t a hard concept, guys. We don’t need the graphic explaining what hater means, especially when these haters are making me pay 24% interest (classic hater behavior).
7. Credit Doctor
You can tell he’s a credit doctor because the lab coat that they gave him at credit medical school. Also, he sounds like a grandma.
6. Star In My Car
This is the charming story of a young man who sees a cute girl in a car, so he decides on impulse to purchase a $35,000 SUV without any research or comparison shopping.. No wonder your credit is bad, dude.
5. Gillespie Chrysler
This guy is pretty good for a rapper in a local car commercial. With a few lucky breaks and some Nutrisystem, he could have been the next LL Cool J. As it is, he’ll have to settle for LH Fat J.
4. Frank Myers
The rapper in this one seems like she’s in a sour mood. Maybe it’s because they don’t let her rap until the end, or maybe it’s because she’s 12.
3. Pinella/Guillén Rap
“Here’s an idea! Let’s get the manager of the White Sox and the manger of the cubs Cubs to do an awkward rap battle about what side of town their stadiums are in. This will sell a lot of Chevys even though they don’t mention Chevys because I am Chicago’s kind of bad commercial ideas. Deep dish pizza, on me guys! Sears Tower!”
2. Cecil Myers Rap
This would have placed higher on the list, but it wasn’t uploaded correctly, so all we know of this masterpiece is the first few seconds. Since we didn’t get to see the whole thing on local television, we’ll never be able to know the true greatness of the Cecil Myers rap. We’ve never wanted to live in St. Joseph Missouri more than we do now.
1. Credit MacDaddy
I can’t imagine people with less street cred. These people don’t even have cul-de-sac cred. Who would want to buy a car from a pimp/Weird Al hybrid?
If you enjoyed this list, you might also enjoy the Top 10 Funniest Video Game Commercials or the The 15 Funniest Strip Club Commercials. If you didn’t enjoy this list, why the Hell not?
This post was written by Brendan, who needs a credit macdaddy and a credit doctor.
